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In a match between a supremely catastrophic California earthquake and the former wrestling star turned movie action hero Dwayne Johnson (a.k.a. The Rock, aptly enough here I guess, although he’s not thusly credited), who are you going to bet on? For movie purposes, the latter, of course. Since we’re all agreed on that, I suppose it spoils nothing to inform you that there’s almost nothing surprising about “San Andreas.”

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